Disclaimer: I have no idea if we're doing this the "right way," if there is a "right way," nor do I always feel successful after a Liturgy with Zoe.
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| Zoe in church holding her St. Zoe icon |
Here's where we are right now with the 2 year 3 month old... A typical Sunday morning:
Mama: "we're going to church. Do we talk loud in church or in a whisper?"
Zoe: "....whisper."
Mama: "that's right! Can you practice a whisper voice?"
Zoe (whisper): "whisper voice"
Mama: "great. Let's talk like that while we're in church"
....in church....
Zoe (super-loud voice throughout Liturgy):
"There's Saint Joseph!"
"What's that man do-nin?" (doing)
"I want to dance in circles"
"The curtains are closed!"
"I want a snack"
"What's that?"
...and various other appropriate/inappropriate comments.
During an evening weekday service this year during Lent, I had just driven 60 miles (half of which was in traffic) across the entire city of Houston, with Zoe in tow, frantically working to get to church on time, hungry, tired, and stressed. We finally made it into church which was beautifully calming and silent. I was so happy to be there! Then Zoe piped up with some loud comment, and one of the old ladies in church turned to us and said, "SHHHHHHHH!"
.... thanks, lady, you just sent the pregnant girl to the bathroom to cry in the stall. (..snifff.."Why do I even try?!")
It is so challenging sometimes to make it through a church service and feel like Zoe got something out of it, I got something out of it, and we are all in one piece at the end. I want to reaffirm my goals/thoughts on the topic here.
- We are there to raise our child in the church, and teach her about worship. If we feel like giving up and that it's easier to stay at home (which it is), remember what we are doing it for! We've committed as a family to make Christ the center of our lives, and this is a huge part of that.
- Remember it's OK that she talks out loud sometimes. Particularly when she makes loud comments about the service or church itself ("There's Jesus!" while pointing to an icon of Jesus.) That means she's learning! We can keep working on the "whisper" thing.
- Be patient.
- Also remember that it's OK if she's not paying attention the entire service - bring books, stickers, and other quiet activities for her to do.
- Engage her as much as possible in the service and continue to teach her the songs and prayers. Rephrase the gospel in terms she'll understand. This not only assures she learns something, but it makes sure I am paying attention, too!
- BE PATIENT!
- She's two years old.
- Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these." (Matthew 19:14)
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| She's two. |
Any thoughts or advice from those older, wiser, or also struggling?
Christ is (still) risen!
xoxo Phae
Phae, you are perfectly do-min the right thing!
ReplyDeleteVery wise! We are trying to raise our 4 the same way, with Christ as the center of our lives and it is very challenging at times! Especially since I am on my own because Nick leads the music for the Mass. On a couple of occasions, we have had to leave Mass before the end because one or two of my toddlers was uncooperative and screaming. However, I believe it is important to try and take them. I think that most people do not mind a talking toddler during mass; maybe that is just wishful thinking! :)
ReplyDeleteSounds like you're doing great. At this point we bring our children to church so that they are familiar with it and we want them to have positive associations with church. I joke that I give up church for Lent, since taking small children to church means I don't get to pray the way "I" want to. I'm always saddened when older folks are less than kind to those of us bringing young children. If we don't bring them, there will be no future church...
ReplyDeleteKeep up the good work!
My parents always brought me (quiet) toys to play with. Although my beliefs have changed as an adult, just the culture of going to church, the feeling, the practice, the trip, the learned silence became part of my normal routine as a kid. Even if she isn't listening at ALL, it doesn't mean she isn't 'getting something out of it'. You're doing wonderfully xxxxx
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